100 Funny Quotes That Will Make You Laugh (Instantly)
发布时间:2026-09-12 | 浏览:1
Quote of the Day
Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twain Inspirational , Life , Hilarious 2824 Copy quote
Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. Alan Dundes Inspirational , Christmas , Sarcastic 2312 Copy quote If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito. Dalai Lama Inspirational , Change , Inspiring 1352 Copy quote Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason. Mark Twain Change , Politics , Diapers 2371 Copy quote When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. Will Rogers Death , Hilarious , Humorous 2486 Copy quote Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Dale Carnegie Faith , Time , Motivation Dale Carnegie (2010). “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, p.372, Simon and Schuster 2563 Copy quote Show source Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. Dennis Wholey Inspirational , Life , Karma 2466 Copy quote As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. Alan Dundes Inspirational , Christmas , Sarcastic 2312 Copy quote
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito. Dalai Lama Inspirational , Change , Inspiring 1352 Copy quote Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason. Mark Twain Change , Politics , Diapers 2371 Copy quote When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. Will Rogers Death , Hilarious , Humorous 2486 Copy quote Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Dale Carnegie Faith , Time , Motivation Dale Carnegie (2010). “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, p.372, Simon and Schuster 2563 Copy quote Show source Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. Dennis Wholey Inspirational , Life , Karma 2466 Copy quote As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito. Dalai Lama Inspirational , Change , Inspiring 1352 Copy quote
If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.
Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason. Mark Twain Change , Politics , Diapers 2371 Copy quote When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. Will Rogers Death , Hilarious , Humorous 2486 Copy quote Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Dale Carnegie Faith , Time , Motivation Dale Carnegie (2010). “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, p.372, Simon and Schuster 2563 Copy quote Show source Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. Dennis Wholey Inspirational , Life , Karma 2466 Copy quote As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason. Mark Twain Change , Politics , Diapers 2371 Copy quote
Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. Will Rogers Death , Hilarious , Humorous 2486 Copy quote Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Dale Carnegie Faith , Time , Motivation Dale Carnegie (2010). “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, p.372, Simon and Schuster 2563 Copy quote Show source Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. Dennis Wholey Inspirational , Life , Karma 2466 Copy quote As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. Will Rogers Death , Hilarious , Humorous 2486 Copy quote
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Dale Carnegie Faith , Time , Motivation Dale Carnegie (2010). “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, p.372, Simon and Schuster 2563 Copy quote Show source Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. Dennis Wholey Inspirational , Life , Karma 2466 Copy quote As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Dale Carnegie Faith , Time , Motivation Dale Carnegie (2010). “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, p.372, Simon and Schuster 2563 Copy quote Show source
Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. Dennis Wholey Inspirational , Life , Karma 2466 Copy quote As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. Dennis Wholey Inspirational , Life , Karma 2466 Copy quote
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian.
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. Norman Wisdom Birthday , Memories , Humorous "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 1623 Copy quote Show source
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Oscar Wilde Life , Hilarious , Witty 320 Copy quote
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen Zig Ziglar Money , Oxygen , Famous Motivational 66 Copy quote
money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen
The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
The empty vessel makes the loudest sound. William Shakespeare Life , Sarcastic , Wisdom 226 Copy quote
The empty vessel makes the loudest sound.
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine 4th Of July , Medicine , Religion 591 Copy quote
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead.
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein Love , Life , God "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com. 2688 Copy quote Show source
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! Billy Connolly Inspirational , Witty , Humor 933 Copy quote
Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes!
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead Inspirational , Inspiring , Laughter 321 Copy quote
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln Inspirational , Life , Motivational Abraham Lincoln (1992). “The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln”, Plume 681 Copy quote Show source
The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! Audrey Hepburn Inspirational , Motivational , Positive 295 Copy quote
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin Inspirational , Life , Sarcastic "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984. 1872 Copy quote Show source
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz Love , Valentines Day , Witty 314 Copy quote
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment Betty White Jealousy , Humorous , Vacation 98 Copy quote
Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment
The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
The road to success is always under construction. Lily Tomlin Inspiring , Success , Congratulations 217 Copy quote
The road to success is always under construction.
Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures. Robin Williams Latin , Humor , Political 192 Copy quote
Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures.
Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. John Wayne Life , Leadership , Badass 429 Copy quote
Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid.
Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno Money , Epic , Winning 205 Copy quote
Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin Inspirational , Witty , Trying 197 Copy quote
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Funny quotes by:
Oscar Wilde Writer
Groucho Marx Comedian
George Carlin Comedian
Mark Twain Author
Woody Allen Film producer
Steven Wright Comedian
Eugene Ormandy Conductor
Charles Dickens Writer
Mitch Hedberg Comedian
Yogi Berra Baseball Manager
Ronald Reagan 40th U.S. President
Will Rogers Actor
Rodney Dangerfield Comedian
Murray Walker Commentator
Dave Barry Author
Mae West Actress
Confucius Philosopher
Demetri Martin Comedian
Rita Rudner Comedian
Daniel Tosh Comedian
Albert Einstein Theoretical Physicist
Barack Obama 44th U.S. President
Mark Twain Author
Benjamin Franklin Founding Father of the United States
Oscar Wilde Writer
Mahatma Gandhi Civil rights leader
Friedrich Nietzsche Philologist
Marilyn Monroe Actress
George Bernard Shaw Playwright
William Shakespeare Poet
Get Social with AzQuotes
Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Every day we present the best quotes! Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends
Quote of the Day
Javascript and RSS feeds
WordPress plugin
ES Version AZQuotes.ES
Login with your account
Find Your Account